Intro to my new book, Hey! Where’s My Soulmate?!

Hot off the Press!

As a professional psychic and minister, I have been privileged to meet so many fascinating and beautiful people.  Oftentimes, they are in a state of torment, struggling to make their lives better, on the brink of the next best thing, the newest chapter. They seek information about any subject you can imagine, but by far, the question I am asked most often is “When am I going to meet someone special?” They are fed up with the “Learn to love yourself first, only then can someone else love you” BS.  They’ve self-helped and yoga-ed and affirmed and internet dated until they are blue in the face, and they still spend every Sunday morning reading the paper alone and every Sunday evening wrestling with the cat for the covers.  For many of them, their ideal wedding dress style has come and gone three times, their biological clock is ticking, and Dammit!, they are not getting any younger.

Many of these clients shop psychics, making the rounds of my colleagues and me, hoping that one of us, any of us, will have the magical, mystical piece that will solve the puzzle of their loneliness, only to hear vague responses about some not-too-distant, but still too distant future and platitudes about keeping a positive, open mind.  (Honestly, I don’t know how it is that more psychics don’t get punched in the face. Thank God for Skype!) I’ve been that person, and God bless the colleagues who tried to help me, who patiently counseled my loneliness-induced, impatient insanity.  What lovelorn clients don’t get, and what I didn’t get, was that we were barking up the wrong tree, asking the wrong questions, and missing the answers right in front of us.  The whole process is both more complex and more straightforward than I could possibly have imagined.

To be blunt, you cannot force the Universe to spit out your soulmate.  As the old saying goes, “Your arm’s too short to box with God.” But you can change your view and set the stage for spirit to honor your request.  In short, I learned the hard way that every relationship has something to teach you, and until you cut the defensive crap and see your own role in failures of past relationships (and some of those may have been in past lives), you will never really learn what you need to in order to get past your immediate lesson and graduate to the kind of amazingly honest, intimate, earth-shaking love you crave.  In other words, if you don’t take a hard look at yourself and face your own shit, you’ll never be ready for what you say you want.  And the Universe will keep presenting you with the same lesson over and over again until you master it.  (Reflect on past relationships with Ms. or Mr. Workoholic #1, #2, and #3, and your hot date with potentially Workoholic #4 for dinner on Friday, for example.) You can’t go on until you break out of the pattern and change your behavior. Spirit could drop Mr. or Ms. Right into your lap right now, and it wouldn’t work out unless you had already “prepared the way” for the relationship.  (I learned that one the hard way, too.)

In the state of NY, we psychics are legally bound to remind prospective clients that our services are not meant to be taken as medical, legal, financial, or business advice and are strictly for entertainment purposes.  I usually tell my clients that readings are for “self-reflection purposes.” May God grant that this book may be entertaining and foster self-reflection.

This book is dedicated to all those lovely, lovable, and loving, talented, successful, nice people I wish I could take home and find the perfect mate for.  You do deserve it, and you are great.  Not finding your partner is not a matter of you not being good enough, sexy enough, or anything “enough.” It is about facing your flaws, learning your lessons, stepping out of old patterns, and being ready for what you say you want. I can’t guarantee that this book will magically change your lives, but maybe it will inspire a few laughs and help you find a new perspective as I try to answer the question, “Hey! Where’s my soulmate?!”

Freedom to Respond Instead of Reacting

Frankl Response Freedom

What an inspiring statement! Being free to choose the next step and to create something positive no matter the stimulus in our life is the essence of what it means to be human, aware, and a force for kindness in the world. In choosing to react in a way that inspires others and keeps us focused on a positive outcome for everyone involved, we are not only improving our own lives, but we are also literally making the world a better place, one interaction at a time. We can stop the snowball of negative responses and express a willingness to receive and enact something better and more affirming. This is key to manifesting happiness, abundance, and opportunity in our lives.

What’s more, when we stop to pause, we permit the possibility of a more positive, new perspective of the situation. At the exact moment we receive the stimulus (such as information, a feeling, something breaking, pain, etc.), we may not be able to see another view or a way out, but the time we take to consider can allow us to receive a new view. Take those moments to walk, pray, look at something beautiful, create, read poetry, light a candle, whatever inspires you. Focus on something positive and give yourself a moment to receive what you need to see the benefit in a situation. Those moments are not only a gift for yourself, but for those around you as well, because they help us to manifest what we truly want.

I hope everyone chooses a positive way today. Even if that path should lead you through some piles of sodden snow, may it lead you to a place of peace, happiness, and inspiration.

Purple Egg Deer

St. Patrick’s Day, Green Beer, and the Fairies

We’re all Irish for one day.

Many of us share in rituals that show our love and support for the Celtic community, such as drinking green beer, attending the St. Patrick’s Day Parade, or even dying our hair green.  The same zest for life, stewardship of nature, and boundless joy that we celebrate on March 17th also comes through in the Irish belief in the fairies. No, I’m not talking about fabulous, flamboyant men in sparkly shirts– I mean the tiny little people with wings who according to Celtic folk belief take care of the environment, our animals, and our homes.

Also known as the “Little Folk” or the “Good People,” the fairies offer an inspiring antidote to this era of electronic isolation and cubicle living.  The great Irish poet, W.B. Yeats captured the joyful nature of the fairy folk in his words:

“Come fairies Take me out of this dull world,
For I would ride with you
Upon the wind and dance
Upon the mountains like a flame.”

We as busy, worried adults can take a lesson from the kids who recognize the value and wonder of the fairies. Through a connection to the beauty and joy around us, we feel better, and we get in touch with our childlike hope for the future. The concept of the fairies is a powerful reminder that worry does not help to improve any situation, and through excitement for life and nature, we can tap into a powerful vision of healing and abundance in our lives.  The positive energy we experience in drawing inspiration from the fairies helps us to bring about happy changes in our life. Happiness, play, and wonder are not only good for children– they are important for adults, too.

Their ecological mission to care for the planet is a powerful part of their message: in order to keep enjoying the beauty of the environment, we have to do our part to protect and preserve the world we live in. It is an investment in the future and in our current comfort and happiness. Besides, the grass feels good on your feet.

 

My friend Barbara dressed up as a fairy princess.

My friend Barbara dressed as a fairy princess.